Uncle Bernie's Farm

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Lyrics

There's a bomb to blow your mommy up
A bomb for your daddy, too
A baby doll that burps and pees
A case of airplane glue

A hungry plastic troll
To scarf your buddy's arm
A box of ugly plastic things
Marked UNCLE BERNIE'S FARM.
There's a little plastic Congress
There's a nation you can buy
There's a doll that looks like mommy
She'll do anything but cry.
There's a doll that looks like daddy
He's a funny little man
Push a button and ask for money
There's a dollar in his hand...

We've got to send Santa Claus
Back to the Rescue Mission.
Christmas don't make it no more.
Don't you know that murder & destruction
Scream the toys in every store . . .
There's a man who runs the country
There's a man who tried to think
And they're all made out of plastic
When they melt they start to stink.
There's a book with smiling children
Nearly dead with Christmas joys
And smiling in his office
Is the creep who makes the toys.

We got this car, when it hits the wall
You can see the guy dying inside
Got the little plastic puddles of blood,
Plastic intestine stuck back into his stomach,
Sound effects, brass knuckles,
'39 Chevy, etc. etc.

 

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Absolutely Free
Absolutely Free